Lies and what lies between

All my life I have had a connection with everything around me. Understanding deeply the truths of each thing. The problem with that is nobody likes being that vulnerable. So you pretend to be naive or ignorant to what people say or do. You pretend to believe their lies or play along with the game. However you grow tired of the feeling you get for tolerating the poison in the well you drink from. You move on and find yourself secluded but the sickness you feel goes away.

Eventually you find yourself looking for company of people who instead are like you you search and find some, but you realize they are just as broken as the ones you sought refuge from before. Few are genuine. Some you become good friends with, but others who refer to you as friend are just poison and you again need to distance yourself. They use “good deeds” to earn favors that they use to benefit their own agendas. Again you find yourself withdrawing. Only keeping contact with the ones you can trust to not manipulate you, and keep minimal contact with others.

From a distance I still see what happens. I see that I still need to be cautious of my surroundings and pay mind to who I let in. I learned this time that strength is not good when it’s only good for the few while it benefits them. Strength needs to endure when it’s hard and must benefit the whole of the community. We are still far from the path forward I guess. Humans are the most flawed species on this planet. A virus that is unlike anything else. Ultimate bringers of havoc that set forth destruction in their paths. Even those who try to live better, still can’t help but to fall to their more basic need for self worth.

I have doubt that there still be much hope for a real positive outcome in the near future. We continue to fall.

Published by Snowy Owl

There was a lot more written here before. Then I saw it was irrelevant. I am just another person with an autoimmune disease and spectrum ”disorder” who is highly sensitive to their environment. I thought I would write a few things down, so here you go. Swim at your own risk!

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