Snowy Owl

esti mortanto

This morning I again started yelling out what I thought was gibberish. I relate it to a Tourette’s kind of outburst. I have what is an uncontrolled physical tic, followed by a vocal outburst of vocal articulation. but instead of noises or just curse words it’s articulated words. None I understand. I started running anContinue reading “esti mortanto”

Falling down the mountain

Tonight I’m struggling. Too many people. Too many crosses through timelines. I can’t hold a thought. Pains through my body as I bounce between them. The barrier that separated the lives is fading. Bleed through of each life playing in my mind like a bad episode recap. The anxiety starts to riddle my body withContinue reading “Falling down the mountain”

Dirty money blues

Dream: Forced to return to my childhood home, I’m already feeling disappointed in my situation. Trying to settle in to get a nights rest, I feel deeply unsettled. Suddenly my mother bursts into my room accusing me of stealing. She’s yelling and throwing my stuff around. She takes my wallet that was sitting on topContinue reading “Dirty money blues”

Another death memory.

A flash of me with two other men in a cabin it the woods, settling in for the night after a day of hunting. Nothing today, but tomorrow’s a different day. A bottle of whiskey gone already. I start singing from my spirit as the alcohol has set fire to my mind. Suddenly I’m lookingContinue reading “Another death memory.”

manifest

So often I hear people talk about things like Murphy’s law or everything turns to shit. I learned a while ago it’s attraction and manifestation. If all your looking for is bad, you will find it. If you think everything turns to shit, it will. First I started negotiating the phrase be prepared for theContinue reading “manifest”

Holiday humbugs

It’s clear that the holidays this year are not feeling so festive. People are feeling like the love and joy isn’t there. Bummed out folks missing their parties and family gatherings. While out today to grab a few last minute items and drop off cookie trays, I was overwhelmed the dark cloud surrounding so many.Continue reading “Holiday humbugs”

Apocalypse and the RV park

For the second time I was at the northern rv camp and storage. On the same bus as last time. The bus is like an old tour bus but 3 times the size, with small med bays divided by curtains for the sleeping quarters. It must have been a medical unit for military services. ThisContinue reading “Apocalypse and the RV park”

Who left the door unlocked?

Being sick is no fun. In no way does anyone ever say “this flu was such a wonderful experience.” It wears you down physically and emotionally. It’s especially hard for those who have to be guarded all the time. Not like inmates, but someone who needs to be vigilant all the time. That’s what itContinue reading “Who left the door unlocked?”

Broken glass

Today I screamed at the sky. I poured myself out on the field of dead grass. My heart bled for so many losses. It’s more than one can bare. I swear I could cut out my heart and leave it there on the ground. It serves no purpose but to ache anymore. My eyes burnContinue reading “Broken glass”